Only You Can See What You Desire
by ClaireBear1982
Summary: The Harry Potter Fanfiction Challenges Forum. The Philosopher's Stone Competition. Lily discovers the Mirror Of Erised, but she doesn't like what she sees..


Lily was running away from Filch. She'd almost been caught out of bounds by the less than friendly care-taker and his skeletal cat Mrs Norris.

"Sniff the beastie out, my dear," said Filch happily.

Lily whipped into a deserted, unused classroom, and quietly shut the door, taking in a breath. 'Great idea, Lily' she thought to herself and sat down on a table trying to regain normal breathing. She heard Filch shuffle past the classroom and stop to listen. Lily held her breath and waited for Filch to pass, which he eventually did. Lily gasped for air and went dizzy due to oxygen returning to her lungs, the she felt the burn in her throat subsiding.

Lily had decided that, since she couldn't sleep she would go for a walk around the castle even though it was curfew and was forbidden. Lily, being the precocious twelve year old that she was, decided this night, the rules were stupid and she needed to get out and stretch her legs. But she was now regretting the idea, not only because she was now miles from Gryffindor tower, but also because she was cold dressed only in a nightie, dressing gown and slippers.

Lily scanned the room and thought she saw an imagine of herself in the far corner. Lily shook her head, was she astral projecting? No,it couldn't be, so Lily got up and went to investigate.

Standing in a corner of the room was a large ornate gold gilded mirror with the inscription across the top:_'Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi_'. Lily studied the words, it was no language she'd ever seen before. It was whilst she was reading it backwards that she realised what it said: 'I show not your face but your hearts desire'.

"Oh," said Lily and looked directly into the mirror.

It was there that she saw herself, but she was older and she had her sister beside her, her arm slung across her shoulders and they were laughing. Lily stared at the image before her. It was true that Lily would have given anything to have her sister like her again, instead of putting up with a tirade of being called 'Freak' all the time when Petunia wasn't ignoring her. The images in the mirror hugged each other. Lily had to tear her eyes away from this image, because it hurt too much. Her eyes filled with tears and lump formed in her throat. The dam broke and Lily sobbed...

Lily came back again and again. She kept hoping that if she kept coming back that the image might have changed, but of course it didn't. This was her hearts desire, for her older sister to love and respect her again and to stop being so mean to her.

Lily became withdrawn and Severus noticed how quiet his best friend had become.

"Lils, what's the matter?" asked Severus.

"It's nothing Sev, I promise. I just need to get this transfiguration homework done," said Lily quietly.

"Lily, you know you can't lie to me, what's the matter?" pressed Severus.

Lily sighed and put down her quill.

"Sev, I promise you, I am fine," Lily tried in her most reassuring voice.

But he didn't believe her.

Third year started off slowly. Lily had already hexed James Potter six times in the last week since returning to school, six times he'd asked her out and six times she'd turned him down, but he didn't seem to able to take a hint and had frustrated Lily so much that she'd turned her wand on him with a perfect Jelly jinx.

It was one night whilst she was trying and failing to sleepthat she remembered the mirror. Lily slipped from her bed and donned her dressing gown and slippers and snuck out of Gryffindor tower, headingfor the unused classroom. It was still in the same place. Lily quietly entered and headed towards the mirror and stopped right in front of it. But she was shocked by what she saw this time. This time stood beside an older version of herself with an older James Potter. Lily stifled a scream of was no way! She couldn't, she wouldn't. She watched as the images in the mirror kissed. Lily turned on her heel and ran all the way back to Gryffindor tower. A feeling of absolute disgust coursed its way through her veins.

Again, Lily shut down and became extremely moody. Poor Severus didn't have a clue as to what to make of his best friends' behaviour. Though it pleased him to see her be even more vicious than usual towards James Potter.

"Lily, not that I'm complaining when it comes to you hexing James Potter, but you seem more peeved at him than usual," commented Severus one afternoon.

Lily just refused to comment. She felt if she tried to explain, she would be sick.

"It's nothing Sev, I swear," said Lily, trying to quell Severus' staring eyeballs at the side of her head.

"Come on Lils, I know you better than that, I know something's really not all right. I'm concerned about you," said Severus kindly, his hand covering hers.

Lily pulled her hand away and gave Severus an angry glare.

Fifth year opened with James Potter propositioning Lily on the Hogwarts Express. So the enraged Lily and Severus both jinxed James at the same time with the same spell and sent James flying out of the door into the corridor of the train.

The year before Lily had gone back to the room where the mirror had been and found it had been moved. This disappointed Lily, she wanted to see if her hearts desire had again changed. It wasn't until she was made prefect and had to do patrols which meant taking in classrooms not always used, that she found it again. It was a stormy night when Lily stumbled across it again in a unused classroom on the first floor this time as opposed to the sixth floor where it had been.

Lily gulped and slipped into the room, taking in the familiar sight of the mirror. She moved so she stood right in front of it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out and slowly opening her eyes.

Again she stood with James Potter. Lily swallowed the bile that had risen up her throat. She felt so confused, why was the mirror showing her this? She had no desire for James Potter what so ever, she hated the arrogant toe rag. Lily heard the door creak open, she gave a gasp and turned around but she saw no one there and the door was shut. Lily figured she must have been hearing things because of the storm outside.

"Lily," came Severus' voice quietly.

"Holy Circe; Sev don't sneak up on me like that," said Lily clutching her chest.

"I'm sorry but I had to know what you were doing in here," said Severus apologetically.

Lily swung her hand sideways to indicate to the mirror.

Severus looked at the mirror.

"Oh I see, the Mirror of Erised," said Severus quietly.

"You know about this mirror?" Lily asked.

"Yes I do Lils, what does It show you?"

"It was second year when I discovered it, and then it showed myself and Tuney as friends again," said Lily sadly.

"And now?" asked Severus, swallowing hard.

"I...I can't, Sev, I can't say it."

"You know you can tell me anything, right?" asked Severus walking forward and taking her hands in his.

"You're not going to like it, Sev," said Lily her voice a mere whisper.

"Please tell me," asked Severus quietly.

"It... it shows, m-me and J-james Ppotter together," Lily stuttered out.

Severus let go of Lily's hands and turned away.

"See this is why I didn't want to tell you," said Lily.

"You desire that ignoramus?" spat Severus.

"I don't!That's the thing!" Lily cried out.

Severus swept from the room. Months later Severus would scream 'mudblood' at her, effectively ending their friendship.

Sixth year. Lily decided she didn't want to know anymore and follow her heart.

Seventh year. Lily decided that since this was her last year, she would give it one more go. Lily had been dating James for a month when she located the mirror again in that first floor classroom. She entered and stood right in front of it. The mirror again showed herself and James together, but this time a new edition sat between them. A little boy with dark hair and green eyes stared back at her and this time Lily smiled.

All along the mirror had been right in showing her, her heart's desire. Lily was happy and her hearts' desire was nearly fulfilled. All she needed now was an end to school and to marry James and start a family, then she would be complete. Her hearts desire would be completely fulfilled.


End file.
